Ludwina's Blog
Day Two - For what purpose?
It was only 18 days ago when I was diagnosed. Not a long time has past but a lot has occured in that time. I just realised that exactly two weeks ago Harry and I were in our lawyers office updating our wills and sorting out our power of attorney for medical and financials in the event that I didn't survive the operation. I recall that day so vividly. We were driving on our way to the hospital to have my pre op day and realised it had been some years since we wrote our wills. Only a few days before that I wasn't sure if the cancer was incurable or not. A few days before that I was completely healthy and had no idea that this creature was growing within my body. How fast things can change. One minute your life is great and in a heartbeat it can all change.
But throughout this time I have not once asked myself 'why me?'. I think it's a stupid question that can only give me a stupid answer. I have learned in my life that the quality of the questions you ask yourself will always determine the quality of the answer you get. So, the question I have been asking myself is, 'for what purpose am I experiencing this right now?'.
It is often said that things happen in life for a reason. I don't know if I believe that necessarily but I do believe that we can make these circumstances mean whatever we want them to mean. I guess that also means that we have the power to choose how we will either respond or react to it.
I haven't answered that question as yet. The time off from my everyday life, business and activities is a nice time away from the norm and I know the answer will come to me. I am certain however, that whatever meaning I give it will be of great value for me and my family.
So, think about the times when life threw you a curve ball; an unexpected challenge, a life threatening illness, the loss of a loved one or a job. What meaning did you give it? Were you able to see it as a gift or did you ask yourself 'why me?'. If you had asked yourself a better question, might you have had a better experience of it or a different outcome? Let me know what you think.
Posted by Ludwina Dautovic on 6th July, 2010 | Comments (1) | Trackbacks | Permalink
Tags: Ludwina Dautovic, Kidney Cancer, The Red Tent Woman Day One - The Second Stage of my Journey to Wellness...
I have just arrived home after having my left kidney removed 5 days ago. I can't believe the journey I have been on just in the past two weeks. It feels quite surreel. In fact, apart from the pain I am feeling it feels like it has happend to someone else. I don't thing the notion that I have only one kidney has sunk in yet.
I feel very grateful for all the messages on facebook, the cards and emails I have received. I believed it was in my best interest to share what I was going through as it would make updating people easier. What I didn't realise was how much of a source of inspiration my journey would become for many of you. I am going to continue to journal about it here and share my insights and personal growth through this. It gives me a sense of purpose and meaning to what I am experiencing.
I have had a really strong mental attitude about it all. I recall the time leading up to the operation was a time that I decided to be strong mentally. I also decided that I would give myself permission to feel what I needed to feel the day I went in and my stay in hospital. I don't believe we can always be one thing. I think we need to experience life through joy and pain as they are all emotions for us to experience.
So, as I lay there sobbing on the trolley about to get put under, I recalled what my friend Linda told me. She said 'repeat over and over that my body is strong and it will heal itself'. That I did. The doctors thought I was nuts, but here I am five days later at home. Thanks Linda.
My next challenge is to allow myself to rest. I can be an overachiever at times. I like to be active, think productively and contribute to the world. But I guess this is my time to receive. I know that givers often don't take time to have their own cup filled, so bring on friends. You can over fill my cup however you like.
Incase you're wondering what that could be I am going to give you a wish list. I love receiving cards with well thought words of encouragement and inspiration. I like plants as they stay alive and can remind me of where I have been. You can come over and cook us a meal and eat it with my family and me. A massage, a facial or a DVD. Just don't forget me now I'm out of the woods and at home. I think this is a time I may need you all the most.
When I talked with my surgical team this morning I thanked them for their persistance. You see, they could have given up at around the four hour mark and said it was just too hard to get it all via keyhole surgery and do the major cut going from my middle front to the middle of my back under my rib cage; but they didn't. My surgeon, Dr Raymond Tong, said the best thing for me was to persist and continue with the keyhole as it would make my recovery faster. His persistance and 7 hours later meant I am sitting at home five days after surgery. His persistance meant that I could be brought back to my family sooner. It meant that I can contribute to the world again sooner (not now but sooner!) and I will get stronger faster. So I am left with a thought. How can I be more persistant? When at times have I given up thinking that it was all just too hard? What difference would it have made in someone elses life if I just hung in there a little longer? Hmm...
Talk to you again later xxx
Ciao,
Ludwina xxx
PS - Please reply. It helps me to stay connected:)
Posted by Ludwina Dautovic on 6th July, 2010 | Comments | Trackbacks | Permalink
Tags: Ludwina Dautovic, Kidney Cancer, Nephrectomy, The Red Tent Woman, Tumour You Get What You Pay For!
I've learned a valuable lesson in the past few weeks; one that I thought I had learned many years ago. I dropped the ball with this one and completely let go of my values and beliefs around this one statement. The result? Weeks of lost revenue and feeling like I've been held hostage. I won't go into the details of what happened because that's not important. What is important is the lesson and that I had the opportunity to be reminded of it.
I'm sharing this with you because it seems that I'm not the only one who is needing to learn this lesson. Many of my clients and members of TRTW find themselves caught up in a bind because a well meaning friend or relative has offered to perhaps build a website for free. Maybe a design student said she'd do your logo for you. Or your son, with all good intentions, said he'd upkeep your computers. Whatever the scenario I am sure you can think of one of your own right now.
The question is - how did it work for you? Did you get the job done in the timeframe that was agreed on? Or did you find yourself at the mercy of the volunteer waiting to fit it in with their schedule? Did you find yourself asking awquard questions about when will the job get done? It's a scenario you don't want to be in particularly when you're running a business. It's always tempting to go the cheap or free route but it doesn't always end up working out and it can cost you a lot of money and wasted time in the end.
You get what you pay for, remember? Many of these arrangements which are created with the best intentions, have been made without an agreement or a clear understanding of expectations. I'm not saying don't take these people up on their generous offer, but make sure you have a clear agreement and outline of expectations in place so that you have the right to expect it done within the timeframe and they understand what you require and when. A good tip here is to make sure there is something in it for them. Whether it's a favour you do in return, you promote their services to your market or cook them dinner. But do something so they feel they are being respected and valued and you can be assured that it's done and done right.
Have you experienced something similar?
Posted by Ludwina Dautovic on 15th May, 2010 | Comments (2) | Trackbacks | Permalink
Tags: negotiations, The Red Tent Woman, small business help, Ludwina Dautovic The Marketing Puzzle – How to get PR for your business.
A dear friend of mine and a member of The Red Tent Business Success Club - Angela den Hollander, is involved in this event and wanted to invite you to join her!
Block your diary and book now, this popular event always sells out!
What do you get?
• 3 expert PR presentations
• Speed networking hosted by our MC
• Door prizes
• Wine, soft drink and a bite to eat
All for just $49 for one ticket or even better value, two tickets for $79.
When? 6.30pm – 8pm Tuesday 26th May
Where? Northcote Town Hall, Roof Top Function Room
How? Book securely online http://www.nextmarketing.com.au/prevent.php
Ludwina Dautovic walking on broken glass at the Essentially for Women
'Secrets to Success in Business and Life Event' in Melbourne
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